Adjusting.

Mother's day was my first night back to work. I was really sad and nervous about it all day. I hadn't even given Demry a bottle before so I was hoping she would take one ok. I was worried she would wake up in the middle of the night and I didn't want Jared to have to get up with her. And I wasn't really sure how it was all going to come together with me trying to get sleep during the day and still nursing her when she was hungry too. Really there is going to be an adjustment period. The night went really good....other than me crying the whole way to work. haha. It was so hard to leave not only my little tiny baby, but all the kids. I have so enjoyed being home. Once I got to work the night was really busy and other than being super tired it went ok. Demry took a bottle like a champ and went right down for Jared. When I got home at seven she was still asleep! I was so relieved. But then iIt kinda went downhill from there. I got a few hours of sleep before Demry wanted to eat again (after her first morning feeding at like 7:30), and then I was up with her for an hour feeding her. Then I tried to go back to sleep and within two hours she was hungry again. So I got up to feed her and Jared got really sick all of the sudden. He had a horrible headache and started puking. So I stayed up and told him to go to bed. So I didn't get much sleep. Luckily once he got up later he was feeling much better and I was able to get dinner made and get to work on time.
That night (or morning I should say) I got a text from Jared at the end up my shift that Demry was up and he was holding her off so I could nurse. From that time it took me about twenty minutes to finish up and get home. He was standing in the dark room bouncing her with her binky. What a good man. So I nursed her and handed her over to Jared and went to sleep. I was so tired that I was out in seconds. Thirty minutes later though Demry was still hungry and Jared brought her in to me to eat. I went back to sleep and then she was hungry again like an hour and half later. Seeing a pattern here? By 11:00 I was up with her for the third time since I had gotten home and into bed and I was a little delirious. Jared told me to feed her and then he refused to bring her back into me again. He said the next time she was hungry he was going to just give her a bottle so I could sleep. It was probably good he did that. I finally got about a 4 hour block of sleep once he did that.
My last night of work was fine. My mom came over to stay at the house because Jared leaves for work at 5 am before I am home. Demry work up that morning at like 4:00 right before Jared was supposed to get up for work. So he just fed her and put her back to sleep and she was still asleep when I got home and luckily my mom didn't have to get up with her (we are trying hard to avoid that).
The struggle that I am having is figuring out what to do on the days that I need to sleep. I am trying to nurse Demry, but of course she nurses the most during the day. So...I will just have to take it a week at a time for now. 

Kai has been trying to adjust as well. I don't know what has been going on with him, but he's not sleeping very well, and he doesn't nap at all. He has been waking up at night a lot....and then getting up in the morning super early. He used to be my kid that slept till like nine every day...I think it all changed when he got into a big bed and shares a room with Tayden now. It's killing me though because he is so mean and so grumpy during the day and I can tell he just really needs a nap. He will yell and throw things or totally do things he knows he's not supposed to just because...maybe for attention? It always seems to be while I am nursing. And then he has been crying over the smallest things so much too. It some times makes for a very long day where he is concerned. Monday he was so pooped that he fell asleep on the couch sitting straight up. He so needs to take naps still.
It doesn't help that he and Tayden have a love hate relationship. They will play really well together for a little bit and then they start driving eachother nuts and fighting. I HATE when they start fighting because then comes the screaming and the tears and the noise....and you get my point. Tayden just isn't quite at the point (or age?) where he can just seperate himself from it and ignore Kai. They both know how to totally push eachother's buttons. Update: Last night Kai slept really well and wasn't up quite as early. His disposition already seems so much better. I just took him potty and he went pee and poop and then told that he's awesome. Hahaha it was so cute. "mom I so awesome..."
He is always telling me that he loves Daddy, but won't really say it to me. He will say things like " I yike you mom." And if I tell him I love him he won't say it back, he just says, "yeah..." And even if I ask him if he loves me he usually says something like "yeah I yove daddy." I kid you not. But today he came up to me and said, "mom I yove you...you my best mom. " Oh my goodness it melted my heart. So basically this boy does so much better when he gets some sleep!
Boston has been so amazing and helpful. He loves Demry and his brothers (even when they bug him) and he really does so much to help me out. He will keep Demry happy if I am occupied or he will help the younger boys with something if I can't. I don't know how many times a day I find my self asking Boston to help me with something or some one. It is so wonderful. I posted a couple pictures of some of Boston's work from school. They are so sweet. One paper talks about Jared being his hero and the other talks about how he wants to visit Mexico because that's where his dad went on a mission.

 One of my favorites from Mother's day was Tayden's answers to these questions. They were hilarious. I love this little boy so much.